Well... Finally I took a decision. I am not gonna match with this HF. I just hold off a skype call with their current au pair, we have been talking for an hour and now I am totally sure that If I accpet them as my HF I will regret it in the future. When I started to think about to become an au pair I thought the most important part is to choose the right family, and obviously they are not. The second thing more important for me is the city. I am going to US for a whole year and I want to live in the correct place. For me this place is NYC. I've been in the US before and I know I will be happy there.
Now I am not in a hurry so I am going to calm down about the match process and I am going to enjoy the summer. If the perfect HF exists I will find them, I just need to be patient. So I can start this experience next September, life is too long.
Thanks for all your support and thanks for your helpful comments. You also have made me think :) That's it!
How the Pink's song says: "You've gotta get up and TRY TRY TRY"
Hi everyone!
I am here again :) I need to tell you something. I was sure I had found THE FAMILY. Everything was perfect: the place where they live, open minded HP, a lovely small HK buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut nothing is perfect! a difficult big HK!
Ok, let me explain myself:
- They live in NYC very close to the most important places.
- He is musician(HD), they are so friendly and love doing parties at home. So they use to have friends over and the au pair is included in the parties.
- I don't have to drive, that's a good point because because I don't like it very much.
- The schudle is so good: just afternoons Monday to Friday and weekends off.
How I said everything was lovely.
Well, They contacted me. We started to speak over email and we did the first skype. I met all the family and I really felt they were the family I was looking for.
During the first called I also met their current au pair and the HM introduced me to her and she gave me her Facebook adress and telephone number.
The second step was to speak with the current au pair. She extended with them for 9 more months so It is a good signal. Well, when I spoke with her , she started to tell me a lot of bad things like:
- The mum is not really nice.
- the big HK has lots of problems and she is really difficult. She needs more attention and she can be really good but she can also be really bad sometimes.
- The mum doesn't know how to manage and She use to apologize the HK so at the end the girl doesn't learn. This behave won't change never.
- Things that the HK use to do: she say bad words to the au pair, throw things when is angry and she even escapes.
Well that's not all, the HM has been so clear and direct. She said I should know everything before I got there. So, she said this type of things about the HK: "The HK knows how to upset the current au pair because the current au pair is a very sensitive person. The HK insults her when she's upset about something or doesn't want to do something the au pair tells her to do, the HK might make fun ofthe au pair's accent or tell her she wishes she had a different au pair or other things she knows hurt her feelings. Then things will escalate because the current au pair gets upset and usually everything gets worse before it is resolved. I think the heart of the matter is that the HK is a kid that needs a lot of attention and when she doesn't get the positive attention she desires she tries to get negative attention but then she ends up even more unhappy when everyone gets upset with her. The more you give her positive attention, reinforce good behavior, compliment her accomplishments and talents, offer hugs and take an interest in what she wants to talk about, the less she will act out. The trouble is that it's hard to find time to do this as much as you'd like while also getting homework done, paying attention to the other kid as well, getting her to eat before karate or do whatever task she is trying to avoid. She also seems to believe that adults who are serious and authoritarian all the time are "mean" because they don't give her many opportunities to laugh, be silly or have fun. So you have to show her you are in charge, but with a smile and a joke, not a threat and an argument. Hopefully you know what I mean. "
That's just some information. So I am confused, I don't know what to do. I don't know If i will be able to manage some situations that obviously will happen. I need to think. They want to match with me but I am not sure.
What to do you think? I know don't exist the perfect family but probably it is too much. Don't you think so?
Despues de 1 mes hablando con familias ( por 9 va el marcador a dia de hoy) mi ilusión por todo esto ha ido disminuyendo. Actualmente, tengo trabajo pero en un par de meses finaliza mi contrato y tengo una sensación de cuenta atrás que empieza a agobiarme. Así que he decidio buscar otras vias y opciones laborales por si acaso my american dream se ve frustrado.
¿Habeis oido hablar alguna vez de internships?
Pues ese es mi plan B. Os explico un poquito de que se trata:
Un 'Internship' consiste en realizar prácticas laborales en empresas en el extranjero durante un determinado plazo de tiempo no superior a 18 meses. El tiempo de estancia mínima suele ser de tres meses.Piensa además que si les gustas y están contentos contigo, cabe la posibilidad de que terminen fichándote al finalizar tu contrato o que te lo renueven. Creo que es una buena oportunidad para lanzarte al mundo profesional.
Se trata de untrabajo temporal que a su vez te permite perfeccionar el idioma, conocer un nuevo país, una nueva cultura y entrar en contacto con el mundo laboral. Además de fortalecer tu currículum, ya que las empresas valoran mucho éste tipo de experiencias en sus procesos de selección de personal.
Hay dos modalidades de internship: remuneradas y no remuneradas. Muchas empresas de muchos paises (incluido Estados Unidos) disponen de internships y puedes aplicar mediante portales webs o la propia web de la empresa.
- Estados Unidos:
Como todas sabeis la entrada a EEUU es complicada. Si entrais en en la web de immigración de EEUU podreis ver que tienen un montón de tipos de visados. El necesario para ir de intership es el mismo que el que nos dan para ir de au pair (el visado j-1) que en la agencia te lo venden como un visado exclusivo para au pairs pero NO, surpriseee! jaja
Bien, ¿Porque es el mismo visado, el j-1?
Os explico que es el visado j-1 (definición que podeis encontrar en la web del departamento de immigración estadounidense:
Dirigido a ndividuos quienes toman parte en un gran rango de programas de intercambio para
visitantes patrocinados por escuelas, negocios, y una variedad de organizaciones. Estos programas son previstos para aprendices de negocios e industria, estudiantes, visitantes internacionales, maestros, asistentes de investigación y en misiones culturales. Adicionalmente, hay muchos programas de intercambio para gente joven, incluyendo programas de empleo de verano, programas de puestos internos para estudiantes universitarios, y programas para au-pair & niñeras.
Por lo tanto, la agencia (en mi caso aupaircare) sponsoriza a la persona, esto quiere decir que justifica ante la embajada americana que la persona va EEUU con un trabajo de antemano (eso es sponsorizar). Sin agencia o empresa que te sponsorize olvidate de la visa J-1.
Igual que puedes encontrar empresas como au pair care con las que puedes ir a USA a trabajar de au pair, también puedes encontrar empresas destinadas a los programas de internship como international internships eso si el precio es mucho mas alto. A cambio de pagar mas trabajaras de algo de lo que has estudiado y tendrás un punto muy positivo en tu CV que te permitirá tener mas facilidad a la hora de encontrar trabajo.
Esto es todo chicas!
Ya os seguiré contando! See youu girls!
P.D. A todas aquellas profesoras, miraros esto que os puede interesar: profesores visitantes en usa.
Ponerlo en google y encontrareis toda la información pero se trata de un programa a través del gobierno de España (Departamento de educación) para trabajar como profesora en EEUU. plan B Hi everybody!
A month later since my aupairroom was online for the first time, I'm still not having a HF. I've spoken with 10 families and I'm losing the hope. Right now, I have a job but I will lose it in 2 months and it makes me feel stressed because I need something to do, I need a plan! I've been thinking a lot and during my Easter holidays in London I got the chance to looking for a job there. I met a girl who talked to me about the possibility of doing an internship. So this is my plan B! (Just in case I won't find a HF who does not fit with me) Have you ever listened about an internship? An internship is like a work experience in a foreign country. You will be able to work there (doing an internship programm) during 18 months. The minimum is three months. Furthermore, If the company feels you can fit in their team, you can have the chance of being part of the company as a worker. I think it is a goog chance to start your professional career. Doing an internship you can improve a new language, discovering a new country and enjoying your free time there. Your CV will be stronger. You also should know that the companies really appreciate this experience to consider your application. I mean, when you apply for a job in the future. You can find two ways of internship: non payed and payed. A lot of companies of so many different countries (US included) have internship programs and you can apply for them by too many websites. United States of America: All of you know that is pretty difficult to get the US (as a worker I mean). If you visit the website of the Department of Immigrationyou will see a lot of types of VISA. You will need a J-1 visato do an internship. OH SURPRISE!! It is exactly the same than the au pair visa. Aupaircare always tell you the J-1 visa is just available for au pairs but it is not! J-1 visa: A J-1 visa is a non-immigrant visa issued by the United States to exchange visitors participating in programs that promote cultural exchange, especially to obtain medical or business training within the U.S. All applicants must meet eligibility criteria and be sponsored either by a private sector or government program. So it is a visa for: internship program, trainee program, au pairs,... What does aupaircare do for you? (I mean about VISA) They are an sponsor. Aupaircare is sponsoring you (showing to the embassy you are going to do a cultural exchange, working as au pair). If you don't have an sponsor, you can not get a visa. Anyway, you can find another companies focused to internship programs like:international internships but you will have to pay more than using an au pair company. You will pay more but you will get a good point in your CV and it will make easier to find a job in the future.
Hola chicas!! Sigo viva :) Llevo tiempo sin escribir porque no tengo mucho que contar, sigo hablando con familías ( ya van 8) y bueno como ya sabreis las que andeis liadas con esto, hay tres opciones: - Familias que te encantan, te emocionas y ya te ves super feliz por los States viviendo este añito con ellos. Y luego recibes el trágico e-mail de....I am sorry but... - Familias que no te gustan de entrada y siguen sin gustarte mas adelante o por el contrario cambias de opinión una vez que haces skype. - La familia perfecta, que te encanta y les encantas. Bien pues ahí ando, buscando la ultima de las tres opciones. Si eso sucede sereis las primeras en saberlo, no sabeis que ilusión me haría escribir una entrada de: siiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!tengo HF!! Y vosotras como vais? Estais encontrando complicado el proceso de match? Muchos animos a todas! Y enhorabuena a aquellas que ya habeis encontrado HF, que os voy siguiendo por vuestros blogs y me alegro mucho! Hasta prontooo! Xx Hey girls! I am still alive :) I didn't write for a long because I haven't had anything to tell you. I am still speaking with families (8 families right now) and how all of you know during the match process you can find 3 situations: - Families that you love. When you find them you get so excited and you start imagining you living with them (all is lovely). BUT, then you recieve the tragical e-mail: I am sorry but... - Families that you definetly don't like. You try to know them a bit more and: · You change your mind. · You still thinking they're not the famili you are looking for. - The last option: you find the perfect family and they also think you are the perfect au pair for them. Well, I hope to achieve the 3rd option soon, I can't wait to write a post for all of you saying: Yeeeeeeee, I have HF!! How are you girls? Are you feeling the match process is pretty hard, too? Good luck for all of you! Congrats to all who has found the perfect HF. I read your blogs and I am so happy for you! See you soon! XXX
Estoy bastante depre, ya que no veo claro que todo esto vaya a salir bien. Cuando volvi de UK empezé con todo este jaleo de papeles, referencias, antecedentes, etc y ya han pasado mas de 4 meses y sigo tal cual vine, sin nada!
Desde que pusieron mi aupairoom online no han dejado de contactarme famílias (3 por el momento, en estas dos semanas) y ninguna de ellas me ha echo sentir esa sensación, esa ilusión que me haga dejar de cuestionarme todo cientos de veces.
La cuestión es, que ya tengo 24 años y que el hecho de irme de au pair no me aportará nada mi carrera profesional. Esto no es más que una experiencia, una gran experiencia (siempre y cuando hagas una buena elección). Así que chicas, no se que hacer la verdad...Sigo a la espera de que aparezca esa família ideal, pero al mismo tiempo ya voy pensando en otras posibilidades, ya le estoy dando vueltas a un plan B...
Yo he sido au pair anteriormente, y como sabreis aquellas que sigais mi blog, mi experiencia no fue buena. Creo que esto me está condicionando mucho a la hora de encotrar família. A todas las HF les encuentro pegas, les veo cosas que me recuerdan a mi antigua HF o simplemente no me gustan nada.
Ser au pair, es algo duro, hay momentos geniales y hay otros difíciles. No estar en tu casa, vivir con extraños, acatar normas, sentirte en ciertos momentos staff....es algo dificil de sobrellevar y depende del tipo de família que elijas tu experiencia será mejor o peor. Pero chicas, hablamos de un año, es mucho no, muchísimo tiempo; la decisión tiene que ser la correcta, hay que sentirse 100% seguros y con toda la ilusión del mundo.
Los blogs de todas las chicas que ya estan en US, no son más que extractos de lo que en realidad es esta experiencia. Además suelen compartir con nostras la parte de ocio que no es mas que el 20% de toda la semana. Así que mirando y mirando he encontrado otras historias, otras que hubiese preferido no ver,ya que son la otra realidad del ser au pair y nos puede tocar a cualquiera de nostras...
Os copio pequeños relatos de chicas que nos cuentan el lado amargo de esta experiencia:
"#196 I think I am wasting my time working as an Au Pair , the agencies sell the program taking care of adorable kids while you are studing and living with an American Family and meet people from all over the world . The fact is that most of the american kids are misbehaving , families here just wanna have an Au Pair because we are cheaper and flexible , studing is not possible because its expensive and most au pairs doesn't have time for that , living with an American Family is not possible because parents are almost all the time out of house , meet people from all over the world and have fun ??? maybe but just during the weekends , that's like 10% of the time , so I am wondering , What I am doing here? many Au Pairs here brag abut how fun and wild are their lives just because they come here to hooking up and fucking everyone but I bet their are bored most of the time ! many of this confessions shows like the only fun thing about being an Au Pair is just to fucking everyone, or actually what are you guys doing here? beeing an Au Pair is worth?"
"#193 I think it was my first month in USA. I had made Chicken for dinner... When it seemed ready, i called everyone. We started to eat... and suddendly my host mum said : " The chicken is not cooked " It was totally out of the blue. I did not agree but i told her that we could put it back a few minutes in the oven. But she didn't listen my wise advice and yelled : " THE CHICKEN IS NOT COOKED " The children and i were confused for two reasons. First the chicken was pretty good, and second, even if it had been not cooked... Well it's just a damn chicken ! Then she took her plate and put the expensive might not cooked chicken in the trash... She asked her children if they would grab something outside with her. Her daughter went with her ... and i ate this yummy chicken with my boy."
Bueno chicas, espero mejorar los ánimos en breve. No os contagies de mi pesimismo.
El camino hasta llegar a ser au pair en USA no es fácil, es un proceso lento que en un muchos momentos te lleva a pensar demasiado e incluso desesperarte y desanimarte.
Con este blog he encontrado la manera de compartir con todo aquel que quiera leerme mi experiencia, mis dudas, mis miedos, mis buenas noticias,...
Desde que empezé a pensar seriamente el hecho de dar el paso y por fin cumplir unos de mis sueños, he encontrado cientos de blogs, muchos de ellos los sigo a diario. Con esta entrada pretendo conoceros un poco más y descubrir otros blogs que sumar a mi lista ;)
Os animo a escribirme o contactar conmigo a través de mi mail mia.ukbc@gmail.com !
Un besazo aventurer@s! jeje ;)
Ánimo a tod@s!
Would you like to share with me your experience? To become an au pair in Us is pretty hard. It is a long process and sometimes you can feel upset or you can get stressed. I've found the way to calm down myself (My blog!). I use my blog to share with everyone of you my experience, my doubts, the good news, my bad days...
When I started to think about to apply in aupaicare, I discovered lots of blogs. The most part of them I am adicted! :) By this post, I pretend you share with me your experience. I would love to know more about everyone of you. And I also want to discover more blogs! So come on, don't be shy and post a comment or If you prefer contact me bymia.ukbc@gmail.com! Best wishes and good luck! Mire
Como decia en el post anterior, una de las cosas que considero son mas importantes en el proceso de matching es PREGUNTAR.
Me gustaria compartir con vosotras cómo me organizo a la hora de contactar con las familías. Yo soy bastante metódica, me gusta tenerlo todo organizado y pensado ya que debido a mi experiencia anterior como au pair intento evitar futuras sorpresas.
Así que este es el sistema que yo sigo:
1. Recibirás el mail de aupaircare comunicandote que una nueva família quiere contactar contigo. Normalmente, a continuación ves el mail de la família que se dirije a ti contándote con mas o menos detalle quien son y sus características como família.
Bien, pues una vez recibido el mail, entro en mi au pair room y me leo toda la información sobre la família (miro las fotillos, ...). La copio en un word y subrallo aquello que creo mas importante (cosas positivas y cosas negativas).
2. A continuación, escribo un email a la familia agradeciendole su interés (bla bla bla), sigo el modelo de respuesta que te aconseja la agencia con alguna que otra variación. En este mismo mail les pregunto si les parece bien que les haga algunas preguntas. Así que aprovecho para preguntar todo aquello que he subrallado de la información de la família. Tambien incluyo algunas preguntas mas generales, del tipo que cosas les gusta hacer juntos en família, como sería un dia típico en su família,...
De esta manera, demuestro que he leido todo lo que me han explicado sobre ellos y también demuestro mi interés por conocerlos mas a fondo (evitando preguntas del tipo: weekends, vacaciones, curfew,... que las guardo para próximos mails jeje).
3. Las familias te responden encantados a todas las preguntas. Además te invitan a que no te cortes y preguntes todo aquello que quieras, así que aprovecho para preguntar again.
Yo creo que es mas facil la videollamada si antes has preguntado lo máximo posible, ya que así no estarás pensando en que preguntas hacer, cuando hacerlas,...sinó que podrás centrarte en la conversación y estar mas despreocupada, respondiendo las preguntas que te van haciendo y manteniendo una conversación lo mas relajada posible.
4. Antes de la entrevista (skype), me hago una ficha con todo lo mas importante de la familia (nombres, edades, dónde viven, hobbies, pets, timetable,...). Esto lo hago porque puede ser que estés hablando con mas de una familia a la vez (por email) y no quedaria demasiado bien equivocarte en el nombre de los niños o llamar a la HM con el nombre de otra, o cosas del estilo jejeje
Bueno despues de este rollo que os he soltado (siento enrollarme tanto) voy con las preguntas:
QUESTIONS ABOUT MY APPLICATION
- What did you like about my application?
- Have you seen my video? Did you like it?
- Why are you interested in hosting an au pair?
- How do you think your perfect au pair should be?
QUESTIONS ABOUT THE FAMILY
- Could you tell me more about your kids' personalities?
- Do they go to schol? (hours x day/days x week)
- Do they do afterschool activities?
- What type of activities do you use to do as a family?
- What do you do in your free time (whole family)?
- Could you tell me more about the rules?
- Do you smoke?
SITUATIONS
- If kid is out of control (yeling, crying...),what would you do?
- If the au pair forget something os she does a mistake, how will you react?
- When you are at home during the evenings what activities do you do as a family?
PLACE
- Do you live in a city or a suburb?
- Could you tell me your favourite places in the area?
- Au pair near.
- Do you use to go out? (with friends)
DUTIES
- how will look like a typical workday?
- Other duties.
- Could you tell me more about the weekends?
FREE TIME/RIGHTS
- Free time. How can I use it?
- Will you need extra hours?
- Information about: internet acces, phone, car, curfew, accomodation.
AU PAIR PROGRAM
- Have you ever had an au pair before? Could you tell me your experience?
MORE QUESTIONS
- Food (healthy, any restriction, dinner together,...)
- Do you like to travel?
- Where do your family live? (mum's parents and dad's parents) Do you use to go to visit them?
Os he puesto muchas preguntas. No es necesario hacer todas estas preguntas ya que de hecho muchas te las resuelven ya con el primer mail. Algunas dudas que te puedan quedar, te quedarán resueltas con la video llamada. Así que nada chicas, mucho ánimo a todas las que como yo ya estais en pleno proceso de match, seguro que encontrareis la familia perfecta!
*Os recomiendo que veais los videos de Romain Menu en youtube.
Y os dejo con una canción que nos de energy para esto del match: Just go ahead now!
